Real Toddlers of Genius: How to pee like a big boy

1. Lift lid on kiddy potty and sit down (sans diaper, of course).
2. Decide sitting isn't the way to go; stand up instead.
3. Squeeze manly parts in general direction of toilet and arch your back (you might even grunt for good measure).
4. Decide kiddy potty isn't cool enough. Turn around to face adult potty.
5. Point manly parts up toward toilet bowl opening. Try again. Notice you're not quite tall enough to crest bowl opening.
6. Smile at mommy as she laughs hysterically while you nearly turn yourself into a girl, vigorously stretching manly parts as high as they'll go, up on tiptoe, your back WAY arched, definitely grunting and shouting, "Daddy's weinie!"
7. At no point do you actually pee, but you're such a big boy now!