Real woman of genius: how to go to the museum during a blizzard

In my defense, the forecast was three to five inches by nightfall. An all-day snow that only produces 3 inches of snow isn't so bad—perfectly manageable with snowplows and salt trucks. And, with the Presidential holiday on hand, traffic would be light.

None of that turned out to be the case, except for the holiday, of course. My brilliant idea to treat Noah and I to COSI was a comedy of errors.

The museum is wonderful, and in my first trip there, I was as wide-eyed and excited as Noah, whirling from one exhibit to the next. But, the day was not without its problems.

The first of which was the fact that parking was not complimentary (didn't know that), the attendant did not take credit cards (who does that nowadays?!), and I was without both cash and an ATM card (a new one was ordered and traveling through snail mail). A last-minute guess at my Mastercard security pin saved my hide, and enabled Noah and I to leave the parking lot, or, as it was, finally begin our journey through the museum once I relaxed about our eventual departure.

COSI—the Center of Science and Industry—is a Columbus, Ohio, gem. It is largely geared toward children, and you can almost feel the youthful brains expanding around you as you explore. Some of my favorite spaces:

Space: where you can walk through a spinning star tunnel, launch rockets into orbit, fly satellites and check out the effects of gravity (demonstrated by bowling balls below).


And let's give a round of applause to "Ocean," where there should be a large sign (like at Sea World) that says: All who enter here WILL get wet. But how cool to shoot water cannons at a Trevi-inspired fountain and to watch how waves are generated. Noah especially liked these water fountains, where he easily managed to soak us both.


A temporary exhibit, Grossology, seems like a haven for 5- to 12-year old boys. There, you can study the science behind burps, farts, bad breath and poop—no kidding. It is a hoot. In this picture, Noah just slid down an esophagus, and he's about to crawl through an intestine, where he will literally "poop" himself out the end. You can't get more kid-friendly than that!


This is no exhibit; it's a self-absorbed "let's capture this moment" picture.

We ended the day in the Little Kidspace, where my little kid got to run and jump and splash his way through rooms hand tailored for him. And the raincoat in the picture? It did not keep Noah dry. But, given his residual dampness from Ocean, I was happy to trade his clothes for dry duds before our journey home.


Oh, the journey home... now that is an understatement. Some of you may recall the 50-car pileup on Rte. 71 on President's Day? Though I was not part of it, I saw the effects of it firsthand. I left COSI at 1 p.m., and I spent the next 2.5 hours (usually 1.25, mind you) driving white-knuckled through a 4-inch clear expanse of windshield. The snow was falling at more than an inch an hour—blurring the skies into whiteout condition.

All the way up the road, vehicles were splattered on the shoulder like matchbox cars. I easily counted 50 cars—including one very large, very askew tractor trailer—in a 5-mile stretch, and they weren't even part of the pileup! By some miracle of God, all the accidents were in the southbound lanes as I inched along in the northbound lane.

When I reached the 71/36 exit, I contemplated pulling into a hotel parking lot, reserving a room and calling it a day. Instead, I slogged along for another hour before pulling into our snow-covered driveway and turning off the car engine with a sigh.

Note to self: the next time the forecast calls for 3 to 5 inches, stay inside, watch a movie, eat some popcorn, and under no circumstances go anywhere.